25 SIGNS THAT YOU HAVE GROWN UP

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any
of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the
question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up"
and "break up."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time
to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as
"dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police
because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the
stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex
jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell
closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and
your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science
Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on
the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the
beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would
severely upset, rather than settle your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid,
not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good
shit."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast
time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to"
replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. Now when you fall down, instead of laughs, its
concern.
24. You drink at home to save money before
going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is
pregnant you congratulate them  instead of asking "Oh shit
what the hell are you going to do?"